Do You Really Want Honesty?

We say we want honesty. In love, in friendship, in life. But what happens when truth comes wrapped in something we didn’t expect? This is a story, a question — and maybe a mirror.

Honesty.

Most people I meet say it’s what they want in a relationship. And yet, it’s also what most people can’t give. (Oh no, not even you.)

We long for what we struggle to give. And often struggle to receive it, too.

My wife once asked me at a rooftop bar in Palma: “If I were sitting here and you didn’t know me — would you flirt with me?”

I said, “I wouldn’t.”

She smiled and asked, “Why not?”

I answered, “You’re not my type.”

But it didn’t sting — because truth, when wrapped in love, doesn’t wound. It deepens trust.

What does that question — and my answer — stir in you? If the feeling is negative, read her question again. She said: “…and you didn’t know me.”

Tell me: If you ask someone close to you a personal question —a question about yourself — can you handle whatever answer they give? And if they ask you the same — can you answer truthfully?

Is your mind already saying: “Well, it depends…” or “It’s not that black and white…”?

Maybe it’s already giving you a way out. And this was a question you didn’t even need to answer. From someone you don’t even know.

Honesty.

Everyone wants it. Few can give it. Few can receive it. And most hide behind excuses. The most common one? “I didn’t want to hurt you…”

They’d rather call the other person too weak for the truth —than look in the mirror and say: I lacked the courage.

As long as that’s the case, most relationships remain dysfunctional. Why? Because people who say they love each other… lie. They call it love — but build it on silence or unspoken truths. That’s how weak their love really is.

Now, can you still have a good relationship? Absolutely. Even someone emotionally caged can say life is fine.

But in a beautiful, lasting relationship, this must be true:

If you ask for honesty — be strong.

If you’re asked to be honest — be true.

Any pain caused by honestywill be overcome — by love.

Daniel Mendoza

Mallorca, 2025